Sunday, November 6, 2011

back

I've missed blogging but at the same time it's been hard to start again...a lot has happened & imaging how to address it as well as get back into blogging like I did before just seemed overwhelming & impossible. and I've come to realize it is impossible because too much is different, which made it less overwhelming...some of it is bad different but some of it is good different so this is kind of a new beginning for the blog as well as for me in many ways.

the biggest thing that will be different about my blogging is the loss of my very sweet & goofy dog Jack.


{he's about 6 months old in this photo}

after going blind he deteriorated quickly & the vet gently started talking with me about how to handle things, at which point I decided to put him to sleep before things got worse. I was very lucky to have a vet who would come to the house so he was able to be outside in the back yard on a beautiful afternoon. beforehand I took a couple days off of work so I could spend time with him & get him things like bacon cheeseburgers, french fries, ice cream & marshmallows to eat. while the decision was obviously not ideal I'm glad that I was able to have some control how it was done & to try to make it as calm & painless for him as I could. after 12 years having him in my life to say he is missed is an understatement - I can't put into words how much I miss his happy face. and I just wanted to say I always thought if he understood how much many of you enjoyed the photos I took of him that it would have made him so happy & to let you know how much I always appreciated the comments you left about him.

some other things that have changed since I went on my blog break are that I'm single now & that I've moved from wichita to kansas city. luckily I have a group of wonderful friends here & a job I love. I'm looking forward now that I'm settled, to get back into crafting & thrifting as well as getting out & about to take photos, all things that I didn't have the emotional energy to do up until recently. so with that said I'm excited to share some posts soon of a trip to a orchard/farm, a little road trip & a tour of my new digs. in addition I've opened my etsy shop back up & have plans to put more energy into that in the new year.

so I'll leave you with this beautiful photo my friend antonio took of the fourth rainbow I saw over the span of two days after losing jack, including one I literally drove through the end of! it may seem silly but in many ways I believe in signs & I couldn't help but feel like they were a reminder that as dark & dreary as life can be sometimes there is always something beautiful & good coming.



p.s. thank you so much for the comments & emails you sent during my break...it was deeply touching to know you were concerned about me & missed my posts :)

54 comments:

GratefulPrayerThankfulHeart said...

So sorry for you loss of Jack. You must have a big hole in your heart for him.

Happy to see you back! Best wishes to you!

Judith said...

I am so sorry for your loss.

I lost my furbaby Gabi last year and I still miss her so much. She was with me for ten wonderful years.

http://outsidetheus.blogspot.com/2010/08/story-of-gabi-feb-2000-august-11-2010.html

I'm going back and reading the posts I wrote in my last blog when she passed and I'm crying again.

They touch your life like nothing else can. But it's worth it, they are so worth the love they bring into your life.

KELLY said...

You needed a break and I'm glad you're back. We're always here, reading along through the ups and downs of your life. Keep talking...we'll listen and we'll walk through it all with you.

My heart aches for you. Please keep smiling, friends are never far.

Unknown said...

So sorry you now have a life without Jack, but he is on the other side of that Rainbow Bridge healthy and happy and waiting for you.....and in the meantime eating all those things that you gave him those last few days! And guess what? They don't hurt him a bit! I also have had a year of incredible losses and understand your need to back away....I am glad things are better and you are back! Sandy

Sarah B said...

Oh I am so so sorry for the loss of your beautiful pooch. It's such an awful decision to have to make, but it sounds as though you had some lovely last days with him. He will never be forgotten.
I believ in signs and those rainbows must be good ones. You have had such a difficult time, maybe the rainbows are a sign of good things to come.
Take care x

Lisa said...

I'm glad you're back, but so very sorry about your boy Jack, and the recent upheaval in your life. I know that pain very well, I lost my sweet little guy, Butch at the end of September. It's so hard to say goodbye... like you, I was able to do this here at home, and I think it was easier for all of us, those mobile vets are angels.

Be gentle with yourself, we'll all be here when you're ready :o)

Sarah said...

Oh ((((((Gina))))). I always liked seeing Jack's happy little face wearing his "costumes" here. He will be missed by me as well.

And so many other challenging changes too. I hope you are able to find a happy, quiet rhythm very soon.

Martha said...

I'm so sad . . . I am going to miss seeing him in those wonderful photos.

I'm just glad you're back, and I'm looking forward to hearing about your new adventures.

Katie said...

I'm so sorry about Jack. I will miss seeing his patiently funny face modeling so many interesting hats! He always gave me a smile, usually in the middle of my trying workday.

I'm really glad to see you back, though! I love all the accordion stuff you've pinned on pinterest lately.

reilly said...

I am so sorry about Jack. :( He was a beautiful, adorable, sweet looking dog. He knew he was loved!

I'm glad you're staying positive about all these upheavals in your life! You'll be great. :)

Anonymous said...

Sorry to hear you've been going through a rough time. Glad to have you back! ;)

Unknown said...

After your loss and all the changes in your life I hope that you can find your peace and strength to move forward with hope of a brighter future. I lost my cat of 26 years 2 years ago and I miss her all the time, she is in my heart though.

Amy said...

sending you hugs

Colleen said...

so sorry to hear of your pup. sending you good vibes & a hug ~

southOCgal said...

I absolutely believe in signs too - I'm sure all those rainbows are Jack's way of saying hey, I'm doing okay, don't forget to smile when you think about me!Stay strong, it may not feel like it now, but trust time - it'll be okay...

a blog about the little things said...

Oh sweet Jack, you'll be missed. I so enjoyed seeing his funny ways, specially during your accordion videos. May he continue to send you rainbows.
p.s. you're blog is a constant source of inspiration, I'm so glad to see you back. :)

sydthewyd said...

I'm so sorry about Jack. It's so hard watching them deteriorate so fast and even harder losing them. My heart goes out to you x

Pilgrim said...

i'm so sorry you've been through the wringer... i feel like a fool, but i'm sitting here with tears running down my cheeks - your gorgeous doggy in costumes made me actually LOL every time. i hope there are many more rainbows in your future.

Mrs. Trumbull said...

Oh, Gina, so sorry about Jack! He was such a sweet-faced baby, and I always marveled at the way he let you put him in costumes! Such a doll! Maybe the rainbows you've seen lately are his way of telling you he's at the Rainbow Bridge. So sorry also about all of your emotional upheavals. We're all glad you're back, looking forward to reading your new posts, and hope everything evens out for you and gets even better! Big hugs!

next door Laura said...

We will miss Jack too. Best, and best dressed accordion audience ever I'd say.

Signs are important for keeping the faith, and keeping a healthy sense of silly.

Don't stop believing.

Be well.

Briana Shepley said...

I am so, so sorry for your loss. There is absolutely nothing harder than losing a fuzzy family member :( A tear (or two) was shed in Oklahoma for you.

I'd say the rainbows were certainly meant for you :)

I wish you well on your new changes and look forward to updates!

Cheryl G. said...

I too, am so sorry for the loss of your sweet Jack.
I love rainbows too and for you to see four in two days!
When I see accordions at thrift stores I think of you (that's a little weird, maybe, but you are the only one I know, in a blog land or real sort of way, that can play and I love your videos of you playing...they are darling).
Hope for more rainbows, hugs, and happiness for you!

Jacey said...

I'm so sorry to hear about Jack! I always enjoyed seeing his happy face in your posts. I know how much it hurts, and I hope the pain fades away quickly.

margil said...

I missed your posts, but seeing how much you've been through it is so understandable that you needed a break. I'm so sorry about Jack. I also enjoyed seeing his smile in your posts, and I know how much it hurts to lose a beloved pet. I also feel for you in your change of marital status, and the move and new job. All of this must be overwhelming. Just know that people you have never met are concerned about you and care.

Anonymous said...

I've never commented before but have enjoyed your blog quite a bit. I just had to comment to say how sorry I am about you losing Jack.

TNTinNC said...

I am so sorry Jack has gone on. I bet he is such a happy spirit, wearing sombreros, wigs, and all sorts of other costumes! I stumbled across your blog months ago and had a doe-c-doe marathon one night and checked out all your posts and cracked up at all your sweet photos of Jack. Best wishes in your new beginning and I look forward to future updates!

Malinda said...

I am so sorry for your loss. It takes awhile to heal from losing your bestest friend. It's been just under two years since we made the same decision with our first shepherd. I still cry every so often that he's gone.

teacup said...

Reading you again is lovely, but it is so saddening to learn of your loss. He was a beautiful boy and obviously very game and fun and so, there's that horrible feeling in your stomach and chest. I'm sorry you lost your sweet buddy, and I'm sorry that was compounded by a breakup (and complicated by a move). Sounds like you've had a rough time. Hang in there.

Violette Crumble said...

Hugs to you, Gina. It took me 15 years to get a new dog after losing my last. I was never convinced I could love another quite as much. Sounds like a real turning point in your life right now, but you are an artist, so I know you will channel all the sad feelings into some wonderful creations until they pass.

Kitten's Lost Her Mittens said...

I am so sorry to hear that you've been going through some hard times, and I will miss seeing sweet and patient Jack dressed up on the blog.
I'm glad you're back!!!!
x Katherine

Kitsch and Curious said...

I'm so sorry to hear your sad news. I love your blog, and the photos of Jack were one of the quirky things to love about it. I hope you can take some comfort from the fact that there are so many of us out here who appreciate what you do, are thinking of you.

dufbuh. said...

So sorry for your loss! I hope you are able to find peace in your new home!

HIldie said...

Adieu, sweet Jack.

Isadora said...

I'm more of a cat person but last year I got my first dog. I became so attached to her in these last months that I can't bear the thought of losing her. I can't imagine how you feel after 12 years, I'm very sorry for your loss. At least Jack was a happy and beloved dog and had a good life thanks to you.
Dora

Anna said...

Jack seemed entirely, completely loveable, and I'm so sorry for your loss.

Sentimentally Me said...

oh sigh. . . .ruf ruf. . . it's so difficult to loose our little hound doggies. So so sorry, but thank you for sharing so many wonderful *(and funny!) photos of him!

Sounds like lots of changes for you, but you seem happy?? That's great!

xo Patrice

Candace said...

I guess I don't have anything new to add to these lovely comments, but just wanted to say I'm glad you're back! Those photos of Jack in all his holiday costumes really made me happy :) So so sorry for your loss. You were lucky to have each other for 12 years!
Good luck in your new city.

susanc said...

I am so sorry to read about the loss of your dear Jack. It is very hard to lose a pet; they are such a part of our family. I hope that the future brings nothing but more rainbows and happy days.

kristin said...

how sad Gina. I am truly sorry. Jack was such a wonderful presence on your blog. how great though to have all the silly and fun photos to remember him. Your optimism and light in this post is so inspiring, a good reminder for us all to find our happiness despite the difficulties we face.

you were missed. glad to see you back here posting. xx

blues said...

so sorry for your loss, i'll miss your funny uploads, they always made me laugh.

i'm sure your optimism will get you a big reward!

Honey Daze said...

:(
I lost my dog, Jack, last Christmas. The decision to have him put to sleep was both the easiest and hardest decision of my life. I completely empathise with you. A year later, I still miss him...
I am so sorry for your loss...

julie (jane's apron) said...

We are going through a similar thing with our dog. It is a wonderful thing that you had the vet come to your home...kind to Jack in every way.

Lucky Jackson said...

I am so sorry for your lost. Jack has a special place in my heart.

FRIZZ said...

I'm feeling for you. I lost 2 labs in 9 months and it's the toughest thing ever. If only they could live forever!! Jack had the sweetest face!!

Anonymous said...

So sorry to hear about your loss. I truly enjoy all the pictures of your Jack. Such a Cutie Pie.

Alli (One Pearl Button) said...

I am so sorry about Jack, Gina. Losing a dog is just plain heartbreaking. I always loved the posts featuring him, and will miss them. It sounds like he had a long and wonderful life, and you made his last days as happy and comfortable as possible. We should all be so lucky.

I'm glad that you are feeling a little bit better and that your lovely posts will start popping up in my reader again - I had missed them!

All the best to you!

Larissa Holland said...

Where have I been?? Oh, I am very sorry about Jack! I have so often enjoyed seeing his winsome face here. He just seemed like one of those once-in-a-lifetime pets. That must have been a very hard decision to make, even though it was the best one, and I love that you made his last days a dog's food fantasy. And boy have you been through some rough months! I wish you much peace and joy in your fresh new start.

alix said...

I'm so sorry to hear about Jack....losing a pet is the most heartbreaking thing ever. They are our first "children", our best friends and our sweeties. Take comfort in the fact that Jack's life was just as touched by your love and kindness (and bacon cheese burgers) as you were touched by his.
Having to make that decisions SUCKS (sorry, i can't think of a more eloquent way to say it). When I was pregnant with my son Wolfie my kitty Chuckie passed unexpectedly—we don't know what happened, if he ate something poisonous or was injured etc. I was heart broken but we had Spencer our awesome 12 year old 3-legger to comfort us. He, much like Jack, we a big love, but just started to be in a lot of pain from the stress of hoppin' around on 3 legs for 10 years. As tough as it was losing Chuckie so suddenly, having to make that call for Spence was SO hard. You are a wonderful doggie mama and Jack knew you wanted him to be comfortable and happy....and hopefully he's up there eating snacks with Spencer, and both of them are annoying poor Chuckie by barking and chasing balls. ! much love, alix

Jodi said...

So sorry to hear you have had such a difficult time. I didn't want to bother you while you were gone - I figured you had your reasons. I am so very glad though that you are ready to move forward and look for the beauty and joy that is in your life now. Can't wait to get back to following your new adventures & I hope your days are now more joyful, beautiful and full of hope.
Jodi

dawn said...

It is hard to put into words they sympathy that I feel for you. We don't know each other in the real world, but these days our virtual friends can mean just as much to us. I'm so sorry for your loss.

Beth Lea said...

God Bless you for the love you gave darling Jack. I cried during this post, especially where you listed the wonderful meals you gave him...

JustGail said...

I'm so sorry about Jack, he's left quite a hole in your life. He'll be missed by many who only knew him through your photos. And to top that off with becoming single and moving. Here's hoping you have smooth sailing for a while.

Erin C. said...

Hi, I'm late to this post, but I wanted to express my condolences on your loss. Jack looked like a very sweet dog, willing to wear just about any hat, happy just to please you. His happy face always brought a smile to mine. I appreciate the energy you put into your blog. I know you'll regain your momentum.

Kireliols said...

I'm pretty late in posting but wanted to share my sympathies about Jack. My dog, Lucky, has been my rock during my divorce this past year- he has been a source of healing for my girls and me and I know that you must really miss having your buddy nearby. My girls and I have loved, loved, loved, checking in on your funny boy and will miss him.
I know that being single again is an adventure in itself and I want to offer my support to you- for me, being the captain of my own ship is a gift that I treasure. Best wishes to you!